The Gifts We Sometimes Forget to Give

Working at Kohl’s this season, I’ve noticed something quietly powerful.
Most of the customers who come through my line are women — mothers, grandmothers, wives, partners, aunties — arms full of gifts for everyone in their world.
Children. Spouses. Parents. Grandchildren. Neighbors. Teachers. Thoughtfulness layered on thoughtfulness.

And after all of that giving, when I hand them their Kohl’s Cash — a small “reward” for everything they’ve just purchased — I sometimes joke, “Maybe tuck this into your own stocking and, on Christmas Day, sneak away and buy something just for you.”

Almost every time, they laugh… and then dismiss it.
“Oh, I could never.”
“Oh, I’ll be too busy.”
“Oh, no, this will go toward the kids.”

As if the idea of gifting something to themselves is too indulgent, too unnecessary… maybe even a little selfish.

But I’ve started to see what sits underneath that reaction. For so many women, especially this time of year, giving to everyone else feels natural. Automatic. Expected. But giving to themselves? That feels uncomfortable. Undeserved. Out of the question.

And yet…

These are often the same women who spend their days and nights making sure everyone else is thought of, cared for, celebrated, included.
They hold the mental lists. They remember the details. They anticipate the meltdowns, smooth the rough edges, create the magic. They pour out love in a thousand unseen ways — and often receive very little reflection of it back.

Not because people don’t appreciate them. But because so much of what they do is invisible. Quiet. Constant.

And here’s the tender truth:
A person who gives that much deserves to receive, too.

Not just in words. Not just in passing appreciation. But in real, tangible moments of care.

A small gift. A gentle indulgence. A pause. A kindness directed inward instead of outward.

This isn’t about shopping. It’s about worthiness.

It’s about the belief — often buried deep — that other people’s needs matter more than ours.
That our desires are secondary. That our comfort is optional. That our joy can wait.
But it’s simply not true.

You are worthy.

Worthy of rest.
Worthy of softness.
Worthy of the same generosity you extend so freely to others.
Worthy of gifts, and time, and small celebrations meant only for you.

Not because you’ve earned them through exhaustion.
Not because you’ve checked every box or held everything together.
But because you are a human being who matters.

So if you find yourself hesitating to treat yourself this season — whether it’s with Kohl’s Cash or something entirely different — I hope you pause and remember this:

You give so much. And you deserve to receive, too.

Not someday. Not when things calm down. Not when everyone else has what they need.

This year, let the circle of your giving include you.
You are worthy. You always have been, and you always will be.

If this stirred something in you, I’d love to hear what you’ve been quietly giving to others — and what you might begin giving to yourself. You’re welcome to contact me or talk it through with me anytime.